I made the acquaintance of a former colonel in the Russian army who spoke at length of an enchanting English nurse he met during the war. I of course assumed he meant Florence Nightingale until he showed me this picture.
In the mean time, perhaps he can tell us how he wintered on Mt. Everest after surviving the simultaneous onslaught of an Avalanche and an attack of the Yetti; all without the benefit of shoes or a coat.
Yes, I had intended something worse originally but after careful consideration and colluding a decision was made to hear a story worthy of a gentleman of his stature. Sir Doyle, I may not be so kind in future requests.
ReplyDeleteMy dear LADY Finley?,
ReplyDeleteI must beg to differ with you on the unkind and shameful remark made about the picture of my dearly departed WIFE of twenty-two years. She was neither homely nor desperate.
Clabatha Jane and I were very happily married, and shared our lives doing what we loved, helping others until the Yellow Fever took her home to live with our Father. She was my nursing assistant after battlefield training with Florence and had occasion to care for many Russian soldiers during the Crimean War.
Sometimes(so it's told) that as a couple lives a long time together, they come to look somewhat alike. It is true that some of our former friends did indeed remark on our similar resemblance, but I never saw it.
As to the former Russian Colonel, That would have had to have been Colonel Joseph (forgive the English spelling, I've forgotten the Russian)Khodzko. Joseph and Clabatha and I all became acquainted just before he led an expedition up Mt. Ararat looking for (of course) Noah's ark, and then again when he was wounded during the war.
I am astonished by your lack of decorum and tact, and can only remark, "if only you were a man..."
EGAD! She looks so... so...
ReplyDeleteGreat jumping Jehosophat, sir! She's... your wife.
A picture of loveliness. The epitome of ... egad.
My condolences, sir, on your... your betrothal. I mean bereavement.
Would anyone mind if I had something a bit stronger than tea?
Incidentally, sir, (my that's strong scotch!) why does the name on the photograph read H. Edwards?
Holy $@#^$@*! Quick pass the Gin and leave the glass. This week is going to be long and eventful. Gin for everyone.
ReplyDeleteLady Finley,
ReplyDeleteI have a question for you. How in the world did you find out about my expedition to Mt. Everest? It was a while ago when I was but a lad just out of medical school. As I remember, it was the year after graduation and before I joined Her Majesty’s Service with the 13th Light Dragoons. It was one of the most exciting situations I've ever found myself in...let me see now, Sir Francis Drake, Sir Edmond Hilary and I began as...
Ah, now I remember, you'll just have to wait for my story.
Major Collins,
ReplyDeleteThank you for your kind word concerning the one true love of my life, CJ (my pet name for her).
Please express to Lady Finley that I accept her apology and I am willing to forgive and forget, even though her choice of words escapes me.